The Nervous Newcomer Encounters the Stodgy Stalwart

 

Scene: A nervous newcomer, arriving in an unfamiliar church, was directed to a pew.

Enter an established parishioner.

Parishioner (annoyed but flustered)

Excuse me, but you are pitting in my syoo.

Newcomer (nervous and also flustered)

I'm sorry, but I was sewn into this sheet.